Monday, May 25, 2009

Gandhi thatha smiling at IPL Marketing


The IPL has taken cricket marketing to levels unknown to man. Be it Strategy breaks, beauty contest, dancing beerleaders aka cheerleaders or human billboards, it has literally cashed in on every opportunity, even toilet paper will contain DLF IPL emblem. It will be evident now that i don't give a damn to this type of marketing. Like it or not we have to put up with this nonsense.
Let me start with "stratallergy breaks". This is the most evident maal making idea of IPL. It was an allergy to everyone but for the advertisers.


I dug deep and found out what happens during this maal time.

"Players:
  1. Strategy discussion for exactly 50 seconds [ only meaningful thing]
  2. Loosen their abdomen guard and scratch itches in the body
  3. Drink some Gatorade[ actually they do that literally every over]
  4. Answer some stupid questions from even more stupid comperes [ the Chinese guy Chang is a good example]"
"Presenters:
  1. Break [ Ads=money]
  2. Call up some player from bench irritate him
  3. Break[more ads=more money]
  4. Ask fans to shout and speak highly of Lalit money Modi
  5. Play repeat of IPL donating money
  6. Once again break [ once again ads= once again maal]"


Next comes the candid terms coined and shamelessly uttered by the commentators like "citi moment of suckses", " DLF mixiemam" and some other pathetic terms. Apparently they are planning to have special names for shots, like Dhoni's shots as inalsa mixie shots [ the company has shutdown and so has dhoni's shot making skills] .



"Future lambs to be slaughtered by Brands in their names

  • M.S dhoni= Aircel Phoni
  • Aila Tendular=Idea Tendulkar
  • Malinga= Sakhti mangalinga
  • Symonds=King'Fisher' Symonds
  • Bret lee=Milka Bread Lee
  • Harbhajan=Havellswire Singh
  • Yuvraj Singh= Nivaran 90 cutting Singh
and many more"

Ask Money Modi why?

Reply:


"our aim is to merge cricket and entertainment,money making and shot making."


Inner meaning:( for unenlightened people)


"U fools we are here to destroy ICL, making money and of course some cricket. It is the golden egg laying duck"
I wont be surprised if Mr Money asks players to Pachai Kuttify (Tatoo) brand names in their arm. Surely Gandhi thatha is smiling.


[ Note: all views expressed in this post are not coincidental but purely intentional]

22 blesses 'n' curses:

K!NG OF T!ME said...

I like the stratallergy breaks. Lalit Modi should see this blog and stop this idiotic things. He should not go overboard.
i would like to call Sreesanth as

Dermicool santh

K!NG OF T!ME said...

I like the stratallergy breaks. Lalit Modi should see this blog and stop this idiotic things. He should not go overboard.
i would like to call Sreesanth as

Dermicool santh

roflindian said...

Hehe...hilarious post. It is quite possible that by next year's IPL, all the field positions will have product names appended to them. Coke Covers, Pepsi Silly Point, Airtel Thirdman, Kingfisher Long Leg...and so on!
Cheers

roflindian said...

Hehe...hilarious post. It is quite possible that by next year's IPL, all the field positions will have product names appended to them. Coke Covers, Pepsi Silly Point, Airtel Thirdman, Kingfisher Long Leg...and so on!
Cheers

vEnKy said...

thanks for the comment ROFL Indian, i also thought of including these in my post too lke "DLF wealth insurance Covers" etc, but the post would have lengthy so i stopped it

vEnKy said...

thanks for the comment ROFL Indian, i also thought of including these in my post too lke "DLF wealth insurance Covers" etc, but the post would have lengthy so i stopped it

Vignesh Sundaram said...

hey really nice, i am wondering all these days on one thing, every one is saying recession and and stuff i dont understand frm where they get millions and millions to invest in a cricket match.

nice one man keep it up.

Vignesh Sundaram said...

hey really nice, i am wondering all these days on one thing, every one is saying recession and and stuff i dont understand frm where they get millions and millions to invest in a cricket match.

nice one man keep it up.

vEnKy said...

our maal is their maal, what we pay for cricket is what they feed off. Nothing sells like religion and cricket in this country.

vEnKy said...

our maal is their maal, what we pay for cricket is what they feed off. Nothing sells like religion and cricket in this country.

ashwath said...

very true Mr. venkey... lol
where do u get all this informations frm ...ur the real mind freak

ashwath said...

very true Mr. venkey... lol
where do u get all this informations frm ...ur the real mind freak

vEnKy said...

Ya truth is the secret of my energy.hehehehehe

vEnKy said...

Ya truth is the secret of my energy.hehehehehe

Ajay Shyam said...

great read venky,, it jus left me in splits!! 'massin money' is the mantra for people like modi, as long as there is the love for the game, there will remain c**** who will want to mint money from it!!

Ajay Shyam said...

great read venky,, it jus left me in splits!! 'massin money' is the mantra for people like modi, as long as there is the love for the game, there will remain c**** who will want to mint money from it!!

vEnKy said...

Ya thanks buddy. Money money money!!!!!!

vEnKy said...

Ya thanks buddy. Money money money!!!!!!

Govind Paliath said...

Hehe. . .funny suff!!I have similar feelings views bout the IPL . . Bledy modi fraudu!

Govind Paliath said...

Hehe. . .funny suff!!I have similar feelings views bout the IPL . . Bledy modi fraudu!

vEnKy said...

hi Govind
nice to see the quintessential mallu in my blog. Modi's next assignment Champions League T20

vEnKy said...

hi Govind
nice to see the quintessential mallu in my blog. Modi's next assignment Champions League T20

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